The 2011 Ranty Awards: A Mashable Journey highlighting the 2011 Year in Sports
After a week of interesting topics here at the SportsRantz Blog I thought it would be a good time to put some positive sports stuff out there to lighten the mood. With 2011 coming to a close, it’s also time for a year in review. But as most of you readers know, we do things a little different at SportsRantz.
Before proceeding please excuse the temporary appearance of the blog, which is going to become SportsRantz Magazine. In the meantime we are in progress for updating a new design. So thanks for ignoring anything that looks a bit “out of whack“, this doesn’t have any bells and whistles yet. But take my word for it, SportsRantz Magazine is going to be an incredible new experience for all of you. In the meantime, don’t forget we have a social networking community for you all to share your rants (sports related), just hit “Home” or “Rantivity” and jump on in, the water is fine!
So without further adieu let’s pop the cork on the awards that will surely introduce some very prestigious awards that don’t exist anywhere but on this blog. I am confident each and every winner will be proud to receive these awards. So proud in fact that they may screenshot their announcement, frame it in a plaque and put it right next to their championship trophies.
The Kimmy Award – The Buffalo Bills
Early in the 2011 season the Buffalo Bills stormed out of the gates with an impressive start to the NFL season. They displayed an explosive offense that threatened the record books almost as much (or not even close) as Drew Brees, Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers are threatening Dan Marino’s single-season passing record.
But unfortunately the Buffalo Bills’ success and the happiness of Bills fans that are bundling up for trips to Ralph Wilson Stadium lasted as long as Kim Kardashian’s marriage to Kris Humphries.
Also, Bills fans are now as bitter about the 7 game skid as they were in Kardashian’s actions during and after the divorce. This award was an easy one to give, as the Bills’ gave their fans promise, hope and for the first in years, a reason to gloat. Only to make an ass out of them in the end with a 7 game skid, no pun intended.
Runner Up – Oakland Raiders
The Foot-in-Mouth Award – Rex Ryan
How appropriate, an award named after New York Jets’ coach Rex Ryan goes to Rex Ryan. But really, the awards committee assures me that this award went through a rigorous evaluation process and was no winner was determined until that process was executed.
Rex Ryan, yet again, proclaimed Super Bowl rings for the Jets leaving havoc in his path by aiming his big mouth proclamations towards other teams like the New York Giants. But this time, Ryan didn’t only fail to deliver, he failed almost miserably.
Not only do the New York Jets fall well short of being a Super Bowl caliber team, they may even fall short of being a Playoff team (if my Dolphins can knock them off in Week 17) making Ryan have to place his own foot in his mouth yet again. He must enjoy it now. And to think this whole time I thought he had a fetish for his wife’s feet.
Runner Up – Lebron James
The Demi Award – Peyton Manning
While his trophy case is stoked with MVP trophies and a Super Bowl Championship, Peyton is going to have to make room for his “Demi”.
We are all aware of Demi Moore’s marriage to Ashton Kutcher coming to a rather tragic end. Many magazines and blogs have reported it was mainly due to Kutcher’s affair with a younger woman and Peyton can relate.
Up until this year Peyton was the apple of Colts’ fans eyes. Whenever speaking of their precious Peyton their eyes would get big and little hearts would flutter high above their heads. But a rather serious injury to Peyton that has sidelined him for the entire season has had many fans calling for a change of guard in Indianapolis.
And just like Kutcher, Colts’ fans flirted with fell in love with college prospect and Stanford quarterback Andrew Luck.
But look on the bright side Peyton, maybe this won’t end so badly for you a it did for Demi.
Runner Up – Carmelo Anthony, Lebron James, Amare Stoudemire, Chris Bosh, Albert Pujols, Cliff Lee
The Leaf Award –
This award goes to 2011’s biggest bust. Most of us recall one of the most famous busts in sports, San Diego Chargers’ quarterback Ryan Leaf, and we appropriately named this award in Leaf’s honor. Just don’t tell him or he may scream at us “to knock it off”
This award goes to Portland Trailblazer’s Greg Oden who for the past few seasons has proven that Portland is doomed when it comes to drafting. You would think that they would have learned their lesson after picking Sam Bowie over Michael Jordan in the 1984 NBA Draft, but they didn’t. A few years back they picked Greg Oden over Kevin Durant. We all know how both scenarios played out.
But here is a look at Oden’s career:
On September 14, 2007, Oden had microfracture surgery on his ailing right knee. He missed the entire season.
On February 13, 2009, he injured his left knee in a game against the Golden State Warriors, by bumping knees with opponent Corey Maggette, and missed three weeks due to a chipped knee cap.
On December 5, 2009, Oden injured his left knee in the first quarter of a game. He was taken off the court on a stretcher. Later, he underwent surgery for a fractured left patella and missed the rest of the season.
On November 17, 2010, the team announced that Oden would have microfracture surgery on his left knee, ending his 2010–2011 season. The injury marked Oden’s third NBA season cut short due to a knee injury.
On December 9, 2011, the Trail Blazers announced that Oden had suffered an unspecified “setback” that left them less optimistic about his ability to play in the 2011-2012 season.
Runner Up – Aj Burnett
The Life Call Award – Boston Red Sox
We all know the commercial, “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up”. Well this award goes to the biggest collapse of the season courtesy of the lovable Boston Red Sox.
Heading into September with a commanding Wild Card lead over the Tampa Bay Rays and a chance to take the AL East crown from the New York Yankees. After leading the Tampa Bay Rays by nine games in the AL wild card race on September 3—when their odds of reaching the playoffs peaked at 99.6%—the Red Sox lost 18 of their final 24 games and fell out of the playoffs on the final day of the season.
The collapse cost manager Terry Francona his job and also spearheaded general manager Theo Epstein’s move to Chicago to help the Cubs.
Runner Up – Philadelphia Phillies
The Mutombo Award – David Stern
You remember Dikembe Mutombo right? The NBA player known for his shot blocking ability, yes him! Well this award highlight the biggest denial of 2011. That goes to NBA Commissioner David Stern.
Stern vetoed a deal the Los Angeles Lakers had in agreement with the New Orleans Hornets that had superstar point guard Chris Paul heading to Los Angeles. Although Paul eventually landed in L.A he didn’t suit up for the Lakers, but rather is sporting a Clippers jersey.
Stern wagged his finger back and forth much like Mutombo did after a blocked shot in one of his games. “No, No, No”
Runner Up – Albert Pujols
Pipe Bomb Award – CM Punk
Most of you may not be wrestling fans, but I am, go ahead and poke fun and I will threaten to beat you up in a scripted match on tv.
Wrestling has gone the route of ridiculousness in recent years. What used to be an edgy, entertaining product that appealed to the 18+ male demographic now is geared towards little kids and a PG environment. Not that entertaining the kids is bad, but the WWE has done so by alienating it’s devoted older audience.
CM Punk, who’s contract was ending in WWE over the summer apparently had enough and on the live Monday Night Raw, a few days before he was supposed to leave, Punk grabbed the mic on live tv and delivered a promo that called out every flaw in the WWE. They eventually cut his mic in this epic monologue.
Rant of the Year – Coastal Carolina coach David Bennett
What kind of award ceremony would this be without a Rant of the Year? Not a very good one!
So this Rant speaks for itself. Coastal Carolina coach David Bennett is the clear winner in this. No runner up needed.
It speaks for itself
So this concludes our 1st annual Ranty Awards. Maybe we will do this next year, maybe not. All depends how much of this I actually remember int he next 365 days. But hey, if you remind me, i may actually remember this.
Thanks for reading!